October 11, 2024
One of the most profound discoveries I’ve had in my life thus far was on one night in Robarts Library working on a linear algebra assignment at 2 AM. It was a seemingly random moment. I was deep in conversation with one of my closest friends about life and how we perceive it. Together, we stumbled upon an approach that involved letting go of the notion of free will. Now, that might sound scary, but with further reflection, you’ll realize it’s actually a comforting embrace. Letting go may feel like jumping off a cliff, but what awaits below isn’t an abyss or jagged rocks. Instead, it’s like a parent catching their child after tossing them into the air-it doesn’t hurt; it feels good once you embrace it. Let me explain.
Every action we take is a reaction to previous events, whether influenced by people or the world around us. For example, if you didn't study for a test because you were tired, that's a reaction to fatigue. You might be tired because you partied all night-a reaction to having had a rough week and believing you deserved a reward, based on your life experiences, and so on and so forth. Thus, all actions in our lives, along with those from our surroundings, contribute to new reactions, creating a continuous chain of actions and reactions.
This raises the question: If all our actions are reactions, do we truly have a choice in them? Even if you decide to do the opposite of what you'd normally do after reading this, that decision is still a reaction-prompted by this very discussion and shaped by your rebellious mindset, which is influenced by your past experiences. Your skepticism and choices result from how you've been raised and the actions and reactions you've encountered up to this point.
I hope you're getting the basic idea now.
This conversation happened two years ago, just as I was entering university. I began to think of life as a movie or a play where we’re actors without a script, unaware of what the next act holds. In a way, isn’t real life the truest form of acting? I believed there was no free will-seeing it as an illusion we embrace to feel more control over our lives. I found a peculiar beauty in this concept. You can never be wrong, and you can never be right. There’s no right choice or wrong choice; there’s just the choice that pushes life forward, keeps the act going, and moves the story to the next moment. This school of thought is generally referred to as determinism.
However, over time, I’ve come to realize that free will and determinism don’t have to be mutually exclusive. I believe there’s free will in the sense that we can control one crucial thing: the way we perceive events in life. In other words, we have some control over how we react to life’s happenings. While much of what occurs is beyond our control and is a reaction to prior events, we possess a tiny joystick that can nudge us in certain directions. This joystick is our perspective, mindset, and mentality-collectively, our mind.
There’s not much we can control in life, but focusing on controlling our mind is key. Things happen - good or bad - and they happen for various reasons. You do poorly on a test? It’s okay; perhaps that’s what was supposed to happen. You break up with someone? Maybe that was meant to be. We inevitably learn from each of these experiences and carry that learning into our future actions and reactions. The crucial point is that how we learn and what we take from these experiences depend on our mind.
Now, I’m not advocating for toxic positivity. In fact, I think it’s horrible because it doesn’t let us truly feel our emotions when we need to. It’s okay to feel sad when things aren’t great and to feel happy when they are. Sometimes there’s nothing to learn from certain events, and other times there’s a wealth of insight to gain. We need to decide individually how we want our minds to be and why. Maybe it aligns with goals we have, or maybe it’s about feeling a certain way in the moment. Whatever the reason, the choice is ours.
For me, as an overthinker, the beauty of this approach is that instead of being anxious about things that can go wrong or right, I can focus on what I can control-my mind-and view life’s events as occurrences that were meant to happen. This allows me to embrace each moment fully. Embrace the sadness, the happiness, the pain, the joy, the grief, the excitement, and everything in between. Cultivating belief in my mind brings a sense of fearlessness. Instead of trying to control every aspect of life or feeling like everything is completely out of my control, I focus on controlling my mind. This feels more manageable than the other two extremes. This shift reduces the anxiety that comes with trying to control everything and brings a sense of peace to me.
Again, while we’re influenced by what happens to us, we get to control what we take in through the joystick of our mind. We are not merely the sum of everything that is imposed upon us; we are what we choose to internalize and how we decide to perceive it. We are what we take in through our mind.
I’m not saying this is the sole way everyone must think. Honestly, I don’t think there is a right answer to this question. I kind of like that there is no right answer because that means everything can be right. I like philosophizing (evidently) but I don’t like philosophy due to this. Different schools of thought feel like closed boxes and force rights and wrongs when we all as humans are kind of in the middle and the best way to be is mix and balance of everything that is constantly changing. You don’t have to live in absolutes. Think yin and yang.
The key thing I want people to get from this long rant is that we don’t have to do too much thinking. Just control your mind, be open to changes in yourself and around you, and embrace whatever comes at you because the rest will fall into place. Hey, maybe my thoughts on this subject will change in the future too. I think I’ll let my mind handle that one.